The week in review

Latest Albemarle traffic fatalities: An 88-year-woman driving a 2002 Buick LeSabre plows into the median and a tree on U.S. 29 south of Hollymead Town Center April 10, killing her 87-year-old passenger, Gerard Joseph Smith. Driver Jeanette Smith dies April 16. The Smiths are the fourth and fifth people to die on Albemarle roads this year; three other people died the last week of March in unrelated accidents.

Latest in the Crozet hit-and-run: Joseph Wade Payne, 20, of Buckingham, turns himself in April 15 for the March 30 death of 71-year-old Carroll Herring on U.S. 250. Two vehicles struck Herring, and police are still searching for the driver of a dark-colored Saab and are offering a $1,000 reward.

Latest Crabtree Falls casualty: Faith Helbig, an 18-year-old Liberty University student from New Jersey, falls to her death April 8 on a hike, becoming the 28th recorded fatality at the falls, the News & Advance reports.

Most serious burns: A 62-year-old North Garden woman suffers third-degree burns on 80-90 percent of her body April 9 when she tries to light a charcoal grill using denatured alcohol. WINA has the story.

Most serious charges: Henry Lee Jasper, 32, of Louisa is charged with forcible rape and abduction. According to Albemarle police, a woman was attacked in the 1600 block of 5th Street around 3pm April 14. She didn't know her attacker and escaped; Jasper was found in the vicinity, arrested, and is being held without bond.

Fattest: Almost half of the fifth graders in Central Virginia are overweight or obese, according to data compiled for a study in the Thomas Jefferson Health District, and nearly one-third of adults are overweight. Health officials are dismayed that the excess poundage continues to spike and people are getting less healthy.  The Newsplex has the story.

Most contradictory statistic: Charlottesville is the second-least obese locality in the country, according to a Gallup and Healthways survey, which found obesity rates all over the country at 15 percent, except for Charlottesville, which clocked in at 14.3 percent, and Boulder.

Most B&Es: Crozet man Caleb Limbaugh Rowe, 34, is sentenced to one year and 10 months in jail for breaking into four Crozet homes last summer, NBC29 reports.

Highest profile missing pet: Jack, the golden retriever/Labrador who bolted from Charlottesville Fire Chief Charles Werner's yard, remains on the lam for 10 days. He's spotted a number of times, but won't come near anyone, including the chief, until April 12.

Most crying over spilt milk: A tanker truck carrying approximately 50,000 gallons of moo juice collides with a pickup on I-64 in Augusta County April 10 and overturns on its side. Both drivers are taken to the hospital with non-life-threatening injuries, and eastbound I-64 is closed for about three hours, according to a release.

Best time to be a Charlottesville or Albemarle employee: City Hall and the county office building shut down ops April 12 in their annual commemoration of Thomas Jefferson's April 13 birthday.

Best way to celebrate Jefferson's birthday: The Thomas Jefferson Center for the Protection of Free Expression releases its 22nd Muzzle awards, a dubious distinction for the most "egregious and ridiculous acts of censorship" committed in the past year. Among the "winners," Oklahoma gets two nods– one for forcing a five-year-old to turn his University of Michigan t-shirt inside out because only Oklahoma university and college team attire is allowed in the school district, and the other goes to David Smith, the principal at Prague High School, home of the Red Devils, who withholds the valedictorian's diploma for saying "hell" until she writes a letter of apology. Both the Democratic and Republican national committees are not-so-proud recipients as well.